Wednesday, 22 February 2017

Life Struggles


I feel like I've been thrown in the deep end of a pool and I don't know how to swim.

I am really struggling at the moment. Everything is going pretty horrendously, and I just don't know how to cope. I'm not making this post for attention, or a cry for help. I just need to let my emotions out. College work is a lot, I know I don't have long to go but its just getting more and more intense as we head into exam season. I've been struggling with a breakup, and also dealing with bitchiness.

Don't get me wrong, I love the subjects I take at college. Just the workload I dislike haha. I have a big piece of media studies coursework to get done, and an exam piece for my photography. So basically, a lot of practical work needs to be done. I enjoy making/doing it all, its just a lot. It doesn't help my anxiety, but soon it'll be over I guess. If anyone has any tips on how they deal with a heavy workload, I dunno I just feel like I need some support.

Secondly, a breakup. Something I have never had to go through before, and something I wish nobody has to go through. Although, unfortunately I guess it is part of life. I found a quote that I feel sums up how I feel quite well, 'I won't glorify or romanticize heartbreak, for me it was a kind of death and I was forced to keep living'. It does sound quite depressing, I'll be honest but its definitely the sort of thing I've been feeling. Being alone is quite difficult, especially when you're not used to it. I just feel hurt all of the time, its just like nothing I've ever experienced before. I guess I should stop rambling on about it now, but I've needed to get this off my chest so bad.

And finally, friendships. Friendships come and go throughout your life, and I sure have learnt that throughout my time at school. Theres been a lot of bitchiness around me recently, and I don't like it. I haven''t experienced it for a long time, but I forgot how nasty people can be. Its good that I know who my true friends are at least, and I'll (hopefully) be off to uni in September, where I can meet new people. I'm really looking forward to that at least.

I'm sorry for another rambly/sad post, I didn't intend to do this really but I just had to get my emotions out. I suppose time heals a lot, but for now I'm struggling to cope. 

- Lucy
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35 comments

  1. Oh Lucy, I am so sorry you are going through this. I can't say I have ever dealth with a bad breakup but I have dealt with loss and death and all I can say is it can hurt so bad for so long but eventually it becomes a part of you just trust that everything will work out and know you are allowed to feel sad and shitty and want to cry all the time. The hardest part is accepting how you feel because the longer you play it cool the longer it hurts. Talk to someone you trust if you can and let yourself be hugged and comforted if that is something that would help you. As for your work, for me when something feel so overwhelming I just want to cry I just do it. I make a list of what needs to be done and then I rank what I least want to do first and do the worst jobs first and work my way through it. I find rewarding myself at the end of every day is the best way to stay motivated and keep my head up. Definitely find things that make you smile like a funny show so you have something to look forward to and spoil yourself a little. I am so sorry about how you are feeling right now and the bitchiness that surrounds some people. They must be very unhappy to act that way for no reason it is such a waste of energy. I wish I knew you in real life, I would love to be able to show you that not everyone is like that. Keep on keeping on, my friend and you'll get there. One quote that always feels like a breath of fresh air to me and makes me feel lucky is "KNOW THAT EVERY BREATH IS A MIRACLE, AND EVERY MOMENT A BLESSING AND YOU WILL ACHIEVE YOUR DREAMS". It has nothing to do with break ups or coursework but it's just a friendly reminder that you're awesome because you're alive. I hope that doesn't come across as condescending and I hope you feel more like yourself soon, please talk to somebody that understands you and will make you feel better or just let you feel bad and listen to you. Sorry for the long ass comment, lots of love Lucy xxx

    ALittleKiran | Bloglovin

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    1. Thank you so much for your lovely comment Kiran - I really appreciate it. The whole list idea is so good, I don't know why I've never thought about doing it before, definitely going to give that a go when I'm feeling overwhelmed with work from now on. I also love that quote and have written it down to refer back to, I love it! Thank you again lovely xxx

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  2. oh lovely. i hope everything will sort itself out soon. take some time to yourself and i hope you'll feel better soon.


    www.elenaisabelle.com

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    1. I'm hoping so - thank you so much Elena!

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  3. I'm so sorry you're feeling crap. I'm not sure anything anyone else says will help, as you just have to get through it, but just in case some Regina Spektor for you, as it always works for me: just because everything's changing, doesn't mean it's never been this way before. Yes, you're lonely; but you've thrived on your own before. Etc, etc. Sending virtual support! xox

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    1. It is hard to take on board what everyone else is saying when you feel so low, but its so lovely to hear people care and have some uplifting words of wisdom haha - thank you for those kind words, I'll remember that! Thank you lovely xx

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  4. Never say that you're sorry for speaking your mind - we need more people like you online who prove that life isn't always perfect.

    I'm so sorry that you're feeling so sad and overwhelmed. It's hard enough dealing with breakdowns in relationships without having to do a tonne of work and keep your life going at 100mph at the same time. All I can say is that you are doing so much better than you're giving yourself credit for. You're getting up. You're working. You're writing blog posts. That counts for a lot! Don't be so hard on yourself, lovely.

    Sending you a hug.

    Bethany | Curly and Wordy

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    1. Aw thank you, that is very true though I really think everybody should speak their mind from time to time and show that life isn't all that perfect. Thank you sooo much for your lovely comment Bethany, I'll remember that and actually I'm pleased I'm still getting up, working and doing blog posts. Just gotta keep going!

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  5. I'm so sorry you have to go through that - it's never fun to go through a breakup! I coped by writing a lot, so maybe writing and taking photos can help take your mind off it. Keep busy, and soon you'll be fine. We're rooting for you <3
    Ela | www.stealingyoursunbeams.wordpress.com

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    1. Definitely not fun at all - I think distraction is what I need, I think I'll get snapping and writing with the blog posts! Thank you so much Ela!

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  6. Oh darling, I'm really sorry you're having such a bad time. I don't want to sound cliche, but I know how you're feeling. When I was in college I had just broken up with my boyfriend of 3 years. It was hard, it was painful. I felt lost and isolated and it took me a while to learn to function. But good things did come from it. I learned a lot about myself; not just about my likes and dislikes, but about how strong I am. Being single is always a good time to work out who YOU are and learn to enjoy that. I always listened to uplifting songs when I went through breakups. One song who's message I really like is 'God Bless The Broken Road' by the Rascal Flatts and it talks about how all the things we go to lead us to someone who is going to make our lives wonderful.

    With uni around the corner I wouldn't pay any mind to people who are mean and cruel. When you go to Uni you are so busy that you only stay in touch with the people that matter most. This is a great way to start again and be fresh. In uni you can reinvent yourself, you can fully be you and people will love you for it. There are SO MANY people at university you will definitely find the people who relate, appreciate and understand you. This was my favourite part about university. I made three friends in particular who have shaped who I am so much.

    I'm sorry things are hard right now, but your life is about to get a whole lot more exciting! Don't hesitate to drop me a DM if you need to talk. Hope you feel better soon.

    Naomi
    www.teatimewithnaomi.com

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    1. Aw so you went through a really similar thing then, thats nice to know I'm not completely alone in the situation! Thats really true, maybe thats something to focus on and I'll give that song a listen, because music always helps me. Thats reassuring as well, I'm pretty excited for uni and to meet new people! Thank you for the lovely comment Naomi!

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  7. Hey beautiful. I'm so sorry you're feeling so down. I dealt with so much bitchiness in high school, and after coming out of it can tell you that it gets better. Truly, it does.

    All the best for the future gorg xx

    Sharni // www.agirlandgrey.com

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    1. Thank you for the lovely comment - I hope it does, and I'm excited to get to uni and make a bunch of new friends (hopefully) haha!

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  8. Sorry to hear you're having such a bad time of it at the moment Lucy, but I'm sure there will be a light at the end of the tunnel soon. I've experienced bitchiness, breakups and being overworked and they're all horrible especially when they come at the same time. I did really practical subjects too and it is EXHAUSTING.

    With breakups especially the only thing that heals really is time. Try to surround yourself with some non-toxic people to take your mind off things and in a few months time I'm sure you'll feel like a different person.

    All the best xx

    The Makeup Directory

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    1. Thank you for the lovely comment Sally, I really appreciate it - it is super annoying when all three hit at the same time, not fair really. All my subjects are practical so I mean its really difficult to cope sometimes, but hopefully I'll get there haha! Thank you again xx

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  9. I'm so sorry to hear you're feeling like this, i'm sending so much love to you right now. I really hope things die down for you soon and you start to manage. The bad times always make the good seem even goodER, and there's sure to be some greener grass on the other side of this. Keep pushing on cupcake, you can DO this xxxx

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    1. Thank you so much Courtney, you amazing gal - I'm trying soso hard, hoping all will be well!

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  10. Oh I have no tips but I'm really sorry you have to go through all this, especially at the same time! You're getting no break! I hope your coursework goes well though and that it will be over soon! Also girls can be so mean but you are not and stay above them and I just hope everything goes okay soon because no one deserves this especially gosh all three at once. Will you have even more work to do after the coursework or will that be you done? (I only do exam based subjects I have no clue about arsty ones) Oh Lucy you seem like the lovliest person ever and I hope all goes okay soon!!!

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    1. Thank you for the lovely comment still Libby, really appreciate it - but yeah, all three at the same time kinda sucks really bad! Thankyou again gal xx

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  11. My heart goes out to you Lucy, I know exactly how a breakup feels and as sad as it sounds, it does feel like a death.. I know people who have been through death will find it silly, but one moment you have that person and the next they're gone and all you have are the memories. The best thing to do is to try and keep yourself busy (and it sounds like you will be with all of that uni work!) and don't hold the emotions in. If you need to cry, just let it out because the worst thing to do is bottle up your emotions. Unfortunately, time is the best healer when it comes to heartbreak - I always hated people saying that to me, but it's true! Also, ignore the girls being bitchy because they're just jealous and when you've gone to uni, they'll all be a distant memory :) I hope you aren't doing too badly and if you need anyone to talk to, then feel free to message me xo

    Char | www.charslittleblog.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Thank you so much Char. Exactly, thats why its so hard because you're losing someone who is still alive and walking the planet. Trying to keep very busy, but yeah the college work is keeping me busy enough! Thank you for the kind words, I'm going to take these all on board, thanks Char!

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  12. Oh girl I'm SO sorry to hear that you're having a hard time. I always feel like everything kind of happens at once; I truly thing that sometimes life is testing us. To see how strong we really are; even though we feel like sometimes we aren't coping; but just by being we actually are coping. I went through an awful breakup about two years ago and the sadness consumed me, but I found a way to turn the pain into strength; I travelled the world, started blogging full time and have now met a wonderful man who I've been with for a year. Just remember that every day gets a tiny bit better; there really is light at the end of the tunnel my love! We've all got your back as and when you need us - take the time you need!

    Hayley xo
    www.frockmeimfamous.com

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    1. Its a shame that it all seems to come at once, very annoying really. Well done for turning pain into strength, so brave of you - and so happy for you that you've met someone new, amazing! Thank you for the lovely words Hayley!

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  13. You don't have to apologise for a sad post. Life happens to all of us. As for breakups, they help us become who we are and they happen so we can move onto better things. I went through the worst breakup a couple years ago, but now I couldn't be happier!

    Danielle xx
    http://www.fashionbeautyblog.co.uk/

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    1. Very true, it does. I'm so glad to hear you're happy now gal!

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  14. Oh Luce (can I call you that? haha) I'm so sorry you've been struggling recently - don't apologise for writing it all down, it's YOUR blog after all, a place for you to write whatever you wish. We've all got you anyway girl! It sounds like you've been hit with everything all at once and it's very overwhelming, it's no surprise you've been feeling bogged down by it all - you're only human and we all have limits. Always an email or whatever away if you're in need of a rant! Lots of love x

    Sick Chick Chic

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    1. Luce is one of my nicknames, feel free gal! Thank you for understanding Josie, yeah bogged down is one way to describe it, but this is life yeah - thank you so much, appreciate you being there for me!

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  15. Don't apologies, getting all of that off your chest must feel amazing and we're all hear to listen :) I know how you feel as I'm doing alevels too and have lots of coursework!! Just keep thinking to the summer when it's all over and all the hard work will be worth it when your off to the uni you want to go to, which I'm almost certain you'll get in to!! Hope this helped x

    Tasha
    http://lovefromtasha.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Its great to just write it all down sometimes - coursework sucks doesn't it?! Can't wait for the summer, because exactly, its all gonna be over! Thank you for the lovely comment Tasha!

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  16. My last year of uni, I was really overwhelmed about these things that you've mentioned here.

    Breakups are hard, but I'm sure you'll get through them. It happens to all of us and at first it is awful but time heals and we get used it all. It also makes us become a better person in a way, its like a lesson. As for friendships, its a good idea to have a few close friends that you trust than a lot.

    I hope you'll feel better soon! its good that you are open to sharing it here, don't apologise for it at all :) Lots of love xx


    ZEKALIN

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    1. Yeah, time heals a lot I suppose - I'm just excited to go to uni and find some 'true' friends I hope. Thank you lovely!

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  17. I'm sorry to hear you're struggling at the moment. sending my love to you and I hope things start to look up soon!xx

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  18. I'm so so sorry that you are going through all of this. It seems absolutely everything comes at once, I know the feeling. It's awful, but you will get through! I found for school not only making lists, but making time tables and (attainable) goals was really important for me to accomplish many tasks. It's also so important that you factor in time to de-stress - like writing blogposts! And to focus on those strong and important friendships. Focusing on the relationships with your true friends will quickly help you forget about everyone else!

    Rebecca | morerebe.com

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